she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
