She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I think my vagina is haunted
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
