420 ftw
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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