please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Never joke about your clitoris.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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