Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
