sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
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YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
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I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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