i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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