i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize