when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
