You can't motorboat a personality
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
