she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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