took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
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at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
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Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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