I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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