Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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