Everything about him screamed your future.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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