Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I love you.
Bad choice
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
