you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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