I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
