If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize