Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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