LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
