is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
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