ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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