i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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