My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
