He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize
