come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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