I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize