Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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