Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
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My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway