Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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