He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
