if you like me you must not know who I am
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
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