I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
