I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize