I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Boobs are out for the taking
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
