Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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