Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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