Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
