how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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