Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize