Her vagina should come with caution tape.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
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