My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize