You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Is it because I queefed?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
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You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
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we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole