Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
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There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket