Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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