I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
