Need sex. Gaining weight.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
