So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
