Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
