Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
