Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
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